With celebrations of Mother’s Day, many women out there may feel that it is a day of lost hope…
I’m not yet a mum, but I want to be. So what type of mum will I be? Will I be firm but fair, will I be strict and hard, or will I be lenient and spoil my young child. I know what I want to be but I cannot tell what I will be.
It is so difficult to know. I have so many ambitions of what I foresee parenthood to be. Like many prospective mums, I watch others and see what I will and won’t do. But that’s all a dream. Ask any mum in real life. The reality never actually follows the aspiration. Dependent on the child, dependent on the circumstances, and what situations life smacks you hard in the face; all that spirit to have a dreamy floaty experience of powder and giggles, is often thrown out with the towel, when your first born cries at unknown hours of the night. Really, whatever you want motherhood to look like, it will never compare to your baby’s motives to eat, poop and be nursed regardless of your own agenda, and that helplessness in the early days to understand how to appease its cries and discontent.
I’ve never experienced it, but I know first-hand from family and friends who’ve shared their own experiences.
Think about it. How would you feel, being dispersed from that comfortable uterus world – the only place you’ve ever known, to the broad stark daylight, and a reality where you don’t know what big face, arms or person will be touching, caressing or holding you next? It would be disconcerting to the most of us.
The only constant is the parent, that person who is there from the first day, holding, supporting and nurturing. They will be become the parent that you need, and there is no other agenda than that. To that little baby, they are the constant, and that fact alone will help shape and grow that little baby into its own existence and character, in this unpredictable and amazing world.
So what type of mother will I be? If that day ever comes, I will be the luckiest and best mother I can be. I will be a mum to a very amazing child and that’s all that counts to me.
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