Dear Friend

You have been with me on this journey for a few years now. You have watched me cry, get angry, frustrated or sometimes just silently grieve through the pain of infertility.

Your strength and your reassurance have been graciously received, even if I have not always told you so. I am comforted by the knowledge that you are always there for me, no matter where you are in your own life, or how far away you feel at times.  friendscartoon

Life can be unfair sometimes, but that is life. Whilst I have been unlucky in my quest to be a mother (so far), I have been fortunate in so many other ways.  First and foremost, your friendship has always been a blessing, and despite what my future holds, we will remain close because of what you mean to me.

I know that there have been times where I have seemed distant. It was mostly my stubbornness, afraid to ask for help or to seek solace in your kind words. But please know that whatever may be, I know you are there for me.

We may go weeks without connecting, and sometimes it is a brief message online to say hello, but there is a knowing comfort that when times are tough, you will run to my side, holding my hand, and keeping my head above water.

I don’t always want to talk about it, and yet I know that you are ready to listen; without judgement or advice, just being there for me.

Today, I am okay. Like so many women dealing with infertility, I certainly have moments where it feels more difficult to comprehend what has gone, but nonetheless, I have accepted that I cannot ‘control’ my destiny.  As such, I realise that my path may not lead me to where I had hoped.   But I still hope.

You my friend are part of that hope. It is your strength and courage that helps me when I feel most disheartened, and it is you who picks me up when I feel I can stand no more.  I am grateful you are in my life, and that you are there when I need you.

Thank you my friend for being there.

My Memoir – Finding the Rainbow

  2 comments for “Dear Friend

  1. December 7, 2015 at 8:22 PM

    What a lovely post Rachel. I too find online friends a great comfort. I am always hoping for you that one day your dreams will come true xx

    • December 7, 2015 at 8:30 PM

      thank you so much for your heartfelt comment – you are a lovely dear friend ! xxxx

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